Lean not on your own understanding

I wrote this post on 11/11/2012 but never published it until now.

"Lean not on your own understanding" comes from Proverbs 3:5.  This was my encouragement today.  I don't quite know how to start a blog.  Where do I begin? 

   I guess I will start with my daughter... 

  

  "Devoted to God". This is one of the meanings of my daughter's name and the reason we chose her name. There is something about having your first child--the excitement, the unknown, the expectations! Yes, the expectations! A list in my mind of what my child will be like and what she will do..."my plans".

  So what happens when reality was the complete opposite of "my plans"?  That is what happened to me.   

  I had a normal pregnancy and delivery and was brought to tears when my daughter was born.  Everything appeared normal, however looking back I would say that her lower muscle tone was the only thing I noticed that seemed out of the ordinary.  At 5 months old, we rushed my daughter to the hospital because she had a febrile seizure (we didn't know it was that at the time). That occurred in the morning....at around midnight we rushed her to the hospital again because of another febrile seizure. Probably one of the scariest times of our lives.  After seeing the pediatric neurologist in the hospital I was somewhat calmed to know that this can be common in children under 5.   As of this date, she has not had another seizure (thank you God)!  

  As my daughter continued to grow she always seemed just a step behind the other kids her age.  She achieved her milestones on the later end of normal, however when it came to language and cognition she was far behind.  Early intervention started at 18 months and although progress was extremely slow, she was showing some improvement.   My daughter is now 3 years and 4 months and improvement continues to be slow.  There is no official diagnosis at this point in time.  If I had to give one it would be Global Developmental Delay (she is delayed in all areas of development).   (As a side note, her pediatric neurologist does not think her delays are caused by the seizures).  

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  I thought I was a patient person...but I found out I have room for improvement!  When raising a child with developmental delays, patience is a must...and when you think you just might have enough....you need to ask God to give you more!  It has been a struggle to accept that your child may never act or behave like a child their own age, but I am slowly learning that it is the trials and struggles in life that give way to complete trust in God.  MY plans did not prevail...but HIS plan will. 

  I love my daughter with all my heart, and always will, no matter what she becomes or how she progresses.  God is in control.  "Lean not on your own understanding".  This was my encouragement today.